Two little stories:

1. I went to church and sat with my friend Nicole's sister and her family. When I sat down, her cute little nephew looked up at me, and very sincerely, asked, "are you an aunt?"
2. Yesterday, I was at the Texas Exes (University of Texas Alum) golf tourney. I was in my little golf cart, going down the cart path, and came around the corner to discover one of the golfer guys peeing in a water hazard. Luckily, he was facing away from me. Anyway, his co-golfer started laughing, and was like, "timing is everything in life!" True, sir. Very true.

I feel like singing...

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-- stop! Hammer time... Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh oh-oh.

Hmm...

I wonder if Meat Loaf ever regrets his choice of stage names.
What if he stopped liking meatloaf, after having really loved it when he was young, because you just know he can't go to dinner anywhere without being served an obligatory meatloaf? How many meatloafs must Meat Loaf have consumed in his life? I'm betting on thousands.

Hefty Tall Kitchen Bags "Stinky" 2009 TV Commercial

I can't stand this woman. Man these are the most annoying commercials. Hows about stop complaining and take the trash out yourself, you lazy broad? I mean, really, she could have taken it out and been back again in the time she stood there making faces and ordering her poor fake husband around.

I rock!

So, today I ran my 2 miles. You know I'm training for the White Rock Lake half-marathon in December. And that I am NO RUNNER.
Anywho. Started training a couple of weeks ago. Went from running ZERO to running 4-5 days/week. My point is, today was my second 2-mile run, and not only did I run the whole thing without stopping or slowing down (which I have forced myself to do each time, but usually it's 1.5 miles, and I am struggling), but it actually didn't hurt! It was like, kind of easy and natural. Of course, I had a couple of moments of "ugg!" but I never felt like I wanted to stop or I might die. I hit that mythical place where running no longer hurts! This has only happened one other time in my life, and before that, I always thought it was an urban legend.
My point is, I'm proud of myself. I am becoming a real runner. Never thought I'd see the day :)

I am starting a petition

I think we need more national holidays. Like, at least one per month. Paid holidays. I don't think they have created a new one in my whole life. That's a long time to not make any new holidays, don' t ya think?

Did I ever tell y'all?

In some movie, someone is talking about a disease they have, it sounds like he says "anorexia," only that's not it. It's some disorder where he has absolutely no stress. Even about things he should have stress about. I think I have this disorder.
Nothing really makes me stress. And believe me, I probably should stress sometimes. There are definitely things in my life that would stress out a normal person.
Maybe this is why my blood pressure is so low that doctors are always like, "umm... you're practically dead."

I really like good ol' TS...

But, I personally think it's kind of both gross and bad when one's arms are so thin that the elbow-bones look all knobby and big, like knobby knees. Sorry, thin-armed girls everywhere. Thin is fine. But this isn't even thin. It's like, creepy.

I am not lying. I swear.

Okie dokie. First of all, please disregard this kind of grody girl and her kind of grody poses. Concentrate instead on the "dress."

Today, I saw A MAN wearing a tank-top mini-dress just like this, except with little grey stripes. At first, I thought it was one of those old-timey mens' swimsuits, you know, like a onesie? And that was odd, not only empirically, but also because he wore it in public. But, somehow, the dress idea was even more odd once it struck me. But, I was not hallucinating. He also had a canary-yellow man purse. So strange. I hope this isn't a trend that catches on. I mean, that thing was mini!

It seems like all my posts lately have been about television...

But, dude, I really don't watch it much. In fact, today I wish I watched it a little more. Because the Oxygen channel played "Steel Magnolias" AND "The First Wives Club!!!"
I am catching the middle-end of "TFWC." I saw like 10 mins of "SM."
Of course, I had a better day than just watching tv would have been. Swimming always trumphs tv on a hot summer day:)

Golden Girls : Sex and the City :: the egg : the chicken

I was talking about "Golden Girls" the other day. How much I loved it, how much I lamented the deaths of two cast members this year, how much as a kid I thought Blanche was freakin' fantastic.

And something came to me. Now, I am sure you may have realized this. And maybe it's just because both shows exhibit four female archetypes, but "Golden Girls" and "Sex and the City" seem to be pretty much the same show. In fact, if they keep making movies, eventually, the girls of SATC will all move in together in Florida and carry on much like the "Golden Girls." (Which is my plan, by the way. If I get married, and my hubby dies before me, me and my most fabulous girlfriends who are in the same boat should totally move in together and just laugh our butts off for the rest of our lives. Beats the old-folks home. By a lot. Moving on...)

Carrie is Sophia. Quirky and demanding. Funny and bossy. Flighty. Head in the clouds. Whiny. Bratty.

Samantha is obviously Blanche. Slutty, glamorous, doesn't give a dang. Frankly, sometimes bitchy.

Charlotte is Rose. Traditional, pretty. Slightly ditsy in Charlotte's case, majorly ditsy in Rose's. Easily disappointed. Idealist.

Miranda is clearly Dorothy. Uptight. Hard to please. A real pain in the a most of the time. Down to earth. A real "get down to business" type girl.

Anywho. I was going to write a real academic essay on this*, with research and citations and all, but I figured a quick little list would get my point across, and be less painful for everyone involved.

*No I wasn't.

Woah

While looking for a pic for my SATC post, I ran across this pic of Jason Lewis (Smith). Does he look like he wants to, oh, I don't know, kill you... and then drain your body of blood, and then drink it, or something?

Guess who's coming back into my life? (FINALLY)

Yep. "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" is coming back on. I have really missed "the gang." Not sure when the season starts (I am sure I could find out with a few mouse-clicks, but I am too lazy, as it is usually September, so I figure it is this year, too), but when it does, I will be in heaven for about 5 weeks. Which is how long it usually seems to last. Not a long season, this one.

AND Jeff Lewis of "Flipping Out!" Although Jeff is looking a little botoxy here, my adoration of him has not wavered. I wish he were my gay boyfriend. Too neurotic not to love.

Snuggie for Dogs - As Seen on TV Network

Thank you, Alison, and Matt, for bringing this into my life! I laughed so hard, I sounded like I was having some sort of attack, and had major tears rolling down my face! I have to re-apply my make-up!
THE BEST PART (which shows how sick I am) is: "Unlike traditional sweaters that you have to force over your dog's head, and stuff their legs through tight little sleeves." (which Alison also pointed out.) I re-watched it (at second :35) at least 15 times. I felt bad each time, knowing how sad it was for the dog, but my sadness was over-ridden by joy and unbridled glee. Wrong? Yes. Am I okay with it? Yes. Tell me that you love it, too.

Here's one.

Why did my 'chat' suddenly disappear on gmail, never to be seen or heard from again? I don't expect you to answer. But, really, I didn't change any settings, and what's worse, I can't find any way to put it back on there! Boo.